How are you doing today? Really. Think about it. How are you?
This question is one of the most asked questions in the United States mainly as a life script “transaction”, ‘How are you today?’ ‘Oh, fine.’ It’s the salutation that most of us go through each day. It’s also the most common question that will illicit a disingenuous or dishonest response. Because…unfortunately…most of us…most of the time…are not ‘fine’.
So…again, how are you, really? Be honest with yourself.
This is the beginning of self love – knowing and understanding that you are not okay.
The next step is knowing that you can change it. Understanding that self love is possible through self-care.
When’s the last time you’ve done something truly for yourself?
What are some things you can do to make some time for yourself?
Here’s a really deep question and I’ll end it here, do you truly love yourself?
If your answer is ‘no’, or ‘I don’t know’…is loving yourself important to you? What can you do to help you love yourself?
By the time my clients have made the decision to hire me as their life coach I learn that, many times, the pursuit of their goals has been halted by one singular question, “Will this work out for me?” And because they couldn’t give a clear answer to that question, their goals were not pursued.
This question doesn’t have to be so black and white. Instead of asking, “Will this work out for me?” Ask, “On what level will this work out for me?”
Crazy thing about this world is that there really isn’t an on/off scenario where, if an individual pursues X it won’t be successful on ANY level… For example, it is virtually impossible for someone to start eating healthy and going to the gym and NOT experience SOME SORT of improvement… If you eat healthy and/or if you go to the gym…you WILL experience some sort of result.
Through coaching, I’m able to show my clients that the level something works out for someone is usually dependent upon how much work they’re willing to put into it and how committed they are to that goal.
As a life coach I can promise you one thing: If you’re able to use the past only as a teacher and a barometer to show you how far you’ve come; if you can use the future only as a sail to guide you and help build your vision; if you can do that and stay in the present, let go, and hang on to the steering wheel of your sail boat of life – life will not magically become easier, it will become easier to deal with. You will be granted amazing power to steer the course of your life and accomplish your goals. It is through this flowing relationship between past, present, and future that will help empower you and help you achieve tremendous things.
You are the Captain of your ship, as your life coach, I can help you as a navigator. That is, essentially, the best example of the life coach relationship I have with my clients. Let’s help you charter your timeline and course through the winds and storms life can bring us!
Life is not great. Life does not suck. Life is neither challenging, nor easy. Life is not beautiful…nor ugly. Life is not glorious. Life is not boring. Life…just…is. A flowing forward moving current that we are blessed and condemned to constantly experience its present. The future is not here. The past is gone. The only thing guaranteed is this present moment. The future will never occur exactly how it is imagined. The past was neither as good nor as bad as it is remembered. The only thing reliable is this present moment – already fleeting. Appreciate it as much as you can.
As your life coach, it is my duty to help you appreciate the present. Only in the present NOW can we do our best work and empower ourselves.
I’m a Life Coach in Los Angeles and my goal setting approach with my clients is two fold.
First, we establish 25 goals. My experience has shown that this really gets my clients’ juices flowing in thinking of everything they might want to improve in their lives. Once we’ve completed the list of 25 goals, I then have them select the top five – the top five immediate goals they want to see affecting their lives.
Once we’ve selected the top five, I ask them to forget the other twenty and to put all of their resources and energy in to making those top five goals a reality.
What I’ve seen is that, it’s easier for my clients to put more energy into five goals, then 25. Focusing on twenty five goals is overwhelming for my clients and they tend to be easily discouraged when, typically, they aren’t accomplishing even one because their energy is spread too thin.
Once one of the five goals has been accomplished, we celebrate, and, like a six shooter, we select one of the remaining twenty and reload the the top five list.
My clients have enjoyed incredible results thanks to this approach.
There is a quote by Confucius that I lend my clients when talking about goals and spreading ourselves too thin:
“The man who chases two rabbits, catches neither.”
Ron Swanson from the TV show “Parks and Rec” also has a very profound (and somewhat crass) quote:
“It’s better to whole ass one thing then to half ass two things.”
How many goals have you set for yourself this year? How many have you accomplished?
If you’ve read my blogs before, or watched any of my videos, it’d come to you as no surprise that I consistently deliver the message “don’t go on a diet.” In order to change your lifestyle and eating habits, you need to first establish a very powerful ‘Why?’ and then commit to that ‘Why’ wholeheartedly.
There is a recent fad diet that has become popular (and extremely effective in delivering amazing short term results) called Keto. Essentially, putting your body in a state of Ketosis by eliminating one very important macro-nutrient, carbohydrates…please read this extremely in depth and tongue-in-cheek article on the consequences and pitfalls of not only the Keto diet, but fad dieting in general. I hope it helps spread the message that changing your diet and lifestyle is much more effective long-term than ‘going on a diet’.
My personal goal as a life coach is to only have you as my client for 90 days. When I take on new clients, most of them are in a state of ‘program’. Their minds have been programmed to think a certain way for so long that this thought process can be seen as the continuing symptom causing unhappiness or dissatisfaction.
My goal is to re-align that program. The program can be seen as simply poor habits, or choices that are in your every day life that aren’t moving your life forward. For the average human, it takes 90 days to change a long lasting habit and that’s where I step in as your coach.
In that 90 days, I will give you tools and resources that will help you improve your every day life so that you are living the best version of yourself every single day. For some, it only takes 30 days, for others, it may take a little longer than 90 days. Either situation is okay and, through our relationship, we will discover which path you are on.
But, my 90 day commitment to you is also a selfish one. The sole reason I chose to pursue Life Coaching as a career was to help AS MANY people as I possibly can. If I take on several clients for several years, I can’t realistically achieve that goal.
Also, if I’m still your Life Coach after two years, I haven’t done a very good job 🙂
So let’s get started and begin this 90 day journey to help change your habits and reprogram your mind into creating the best version of you!