A Cheat Sheet for the Life Coaching Process 

The Life Coaching process, overall, can be extremely deep, but fulfilling and I wanted to share a quick snapshot of what one can expect on the initial coaching session. Rarely will my clients experience a lot of me telling them what they SHOULD or OUGHT to do. My sessions are, overall, guided by the client. Much like a therapy session, I use the Socratic approach to help my clients dig deep inside themselves by asking strong questions. Here are a select handful of questions I will ask my clients on the initial session so that we can discover in what direction we should go, moving forward, on other sessions.

1. Why do you feel that you need a life coach?
Every Life Coach will (or should) ask this question. It’s an obvious question that helps us uncover the initial motivation of seeking the guidance of a life coach. 

2. How’s that going for you?
This is a gentle question that allows a soft prod into how deep is the specific issue brought up in Question #1. Often, we’re able to uncover completely separate issues my client wasn’t consciously thinking about. We’re able to attack those head on (typically a limiting belief my client didn’t even know they had!)

3. How long has this been going on?
An obvious question that lets me know how far these issues have gone on while showing my client, front-and-center, how long they’ve been living this way.    

4. What have you tried to do about it? 
Always important to uncover if there are any tools that are already working or, conversely, the specific tools that are failing.

5. How’d that work out?  
A continuation of Question #4 – showing both of us what has/hasn’t worked and the consequences or opportunity those efforts created.

6. How much do you suppose that’s cost you?  
This doesn’t necessarily have to be any sort of dollar amount. This is a deep question really designed to uncover consequences, limitations, and anything else holding my client back from bringing positive change into their lives.

7. How much longer do you think this is going to go on?  
Another deep question allowing my client to visualize a future of immediate change.

8. What happens if it doesn’t change?  
This question is a partner of Question #7, letting my client visualize a future where nothing changes. This question is designed as a wake-up call to show the client how important it is to stop living the way they have. 

9. How does that make you feel?
This is the deepest question of all. The entire time we’ve been thinking logically about certain circumstances revealed in the session. Some issues the client may not have realized they were dealing with. Turning away from logic and looking inward to the heart and soul, we’re able to come to an agreement that something has to change!

10. What should we do?  
And this is where the fun begins! Armed with the knowledge of what needs to change, we’re able to team up and figure out, together, what action plan needs to take place to get the momentum rolling for positive permanent growth! 

It is important to note, again, that not everyone gets asked every single question, or in this order. My clients show me, through conversation, what they need and we develop an action plan together.

Are you ready for your initial life coaching session? Are you ready to answer these tough questions? Let’s get to work: CONNECT

 

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Quick Q & A with Life Coach Tommy

What is the number one take away you hope your clients have after one of your sessions?

Man, there are a lot of take aways and it really depends on where my client is in the process and really their life. But if I had to choose just one I’d have to say that I hope they feel empowered by the idea that they, personally, have the tools to create positive permanent momentum in their lives. I love the a-ha! moment in my client’s eyes when they connect with that and can feel a spark of energy that positive change IS possible.

Why did you choose Life Coaching?

Too many people have convinced themselves that they aren’t deserving of a positive life. Many people have accepted that life is supposed to be a negative experience. I’ve always wanted to show people that all of these limiting beliefs simply aren’t true. As trite as this may sound, I really do want to help people realize their FULL potential. Because the reality is that life can be a struggle, but it doesn’t have to be a negative experience.

If someone chose not to use Life Coaching, what is one piece of advice you would give them?

Whatever you do, create goals for yourself. Give your life purpose by creating goals and writing those goals down. Then commit to those goals and do whatever it takes to achieve them. And, no matter what, stay the course!

Losing Weight Part 3

It’s such a common goal, it gets three separate blogs. Health and nutrition will actually get a lot of attention as, without it, achieving other goals becomes more challenging than they could be if health were more under control.

Losing Weight is actually extremely simple, as it’s basic foundation is driven through static scientific physiology. Essentially, if you do A, you will get B. There is no mystery or magic behind it. The weight loss challenge exists due to the fact that we live in a culture that pushes us to consume all kinds of delicious food. Overcoming the psychological temptation is the key to immersing yourself in the science that will create weight loss.

Here are the three simple keys to losing weight and feeling great:

1. Calorie count

Everyone has a minimum calorie count that will trigger weight loss. You’ll have to figure out your own based on age and height.

2. Micronutrients

Eating 1000 calories of pizza vs eating 1000 calories of carrots will administer the same weight loss results. However, you won’t feel great in either situation…

3. Fitness

This doesn’t mean, essentially, sweating it out at the gym every single day. Fitness could be just getting your heart to pump blood through your veins for 20 minutes at a faster pace than it normally would.

And that’s it. Calorie count, micronutrients, and fitness. So simple, yet so hard to commit to.

So how do we commit to it? Well, that requires intensive goal setting and establishing a powerful WHY, which a life coach can help with.

Communication IS key

The very first thing I look into when starting a relationship with a life coaching client is their communication skills. I assess where they are in their life when it comes to two extremely important avenues of communication: the way they communicate with the people around them, and, most importantly, the way they communicate with themselves.

The second part is where we dig deep, for if we aren’t starting off with positive communication with self, we aren’t going to get anywhere.

It is so important to develop a positive relationship with self. If you aren’t developing a positive relationship with yourself, it is virtually impossible to have a positive relationship with anyone else in your life.

Once you’ve learned to love yourself, you can genuinely express and communicate positively with others and you’ll be surprised by how much easier it will be to fulfill your goals.

Today, use this Monday to motivate yourself into positive self-love. If you’ve damaged the relationship with self, take time, be patient, but start today by looking at yourself in the mirror and appreciating the positive strengths you do have.

Want vs Will

When I first speak with my life coaching clients, our focus is aligned toward what they want out of life, and what they think they need to change in order to make their lives more fulfilling.

And each time my clients say they ‘WANT’ something or they ‘WANT’ to be something, I ask if they’re committed enough to that idea to shift their focus and say that they WILL have it or they WILL be it.

Whenever you say ‘I WANT to be a millionaire.’ The Universe takes note and creates it for you. The WANT is created and nothing else.

But when you say you WILL be a millionaire, the universe takes note of that as well. Suddenly, your inner psychology takes control and starts constructing paths on how to get there.

Once my clients are committed to what they WILL become or have, we are then able to focus on the next step and lay out a path of HOW.

Don’t be a ‘wannabe’, commit, make a decision and say what you WILL become, what you WILL have, what you WILL do and the Universe will take note.